National Adoption Month - Melissa's Story
I don’t know many details about what led up to my adoption, other than my birth mother was about 16 and birth father was about 17, and they chose adoption. I was placed in a foster home after I was born, until I went to my forever home with my parents when I was four months old. My adoption became finalized when I was 17 months old. My (adoptive) parents suffered from infertility, so they turned to adoption. After my adoption was finalized, they immediately applied for another adoption. It took 8 years of waiting, but we finally welcomed her into our family through a private adoption.
Growing up I had friends who didn’t understand much about adoption, and they would say things like my parents weren’t really my parents, and my sister isn’t my ‘real’ sister, and that my birth parents didn’t love me. It was always an opportunity to share my story, and educate them on adoption. Because my we are all Caucasian, it’s not blatantly obvious that we are adopted. While I never kept it a secret, it didn’t come up in regular conversations. When people asked who I got my blonde hair and height from (my parents are brunettes, and I’m an inch taller than my dad) or who my sister got her super curly hair and why she’s so short (we all have straight hair, and she’s the shortest of the family) is when I would say I was adopted.
I don’t remember the exact day I “found out” I was adopted – I just always knew. My mom says that she used Sesame Street as an example to me as a toddler, because a boy on there was adopted. They were always very open about talking about the adoption, and even shared the few paperwork they have from my adoption. I occasionally think about my biological parents – especially on my birthday and Christmas. I wonder if they ever think about me, are trying to find me, or if I have any birth brothers/sisters. I also think about if I look like them. It was challenging at times growing up, when I saw my friends look like their siblings and parents. I had always looked forward to that day when I would have kids and they would look like me (and God blessed me with three little boys, one of which is my husband’s clone but the other two look very much like me.)
Thanks to our friend, Melissa, for sharing!